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How to Bring Up Divorce to Your Spouse

How to Bring Up Divorce to Your Spouse

The decision to end your marriage is a difficult one to make. If you’ve been thinking about ending your marriage, you may also be wondering how you should break this news to your spouse. How you decide to tell your spouse you want a divorce is determined by whether or not you have discussed it in the past. If you have not, this news could come as a shock to your spouse. They will likely feel the gamut of emotions from anger to sadness, which is why it is important to have a game plan before you decide to break the news.

Don’t Just Pack Your Bags and Leave

One of the worst ways you can tell someone you are leaving them is to pack your things and serve your spouse the divorce papers as you walk out the door. Studies have shown that ending a marriage can feel just like a death in the family. You may have processed the feelings you have about ending your marriage, but your spouse certainly has not. Serving divorce papers out of the blue could cause unwanted conflict and tension later on down the road as you and your Framingham divorce attorney settle your divorce.

Timing is Everything

There is no worse feeling than trying to have a serious discussion only to have your youngest child come into the room to ask for something. Find a time where you and your spouse can be alone long enough to share your feelings. Give your spouse time to respond your decision to divorce. If you are truly open to fixing your marriage, perhaps let your partner know you are unhappy before making the decision to divorce. This way, you can both discuss setting a timeline for improving and working on your marriage.

Be Direct and Compassionate

If you are not open to fixing your marriage, be direct and firm when you tell your spouse you want a divorce. Remember, you can be firm in your decision without being cruel; you have had time to grieve the loss of your marriage but your spouse has not. Try to be compassionate and understanding during this period but don’t give them false hope if you are not interested in resolving your marital problems.

Stay Safe

If your husband or wife has a history of violence, you should consider where the safest place to tell them you want to divorce would be. Consider breaking the news in a public place or with a third-party. If you fear for your safety after informing your spouse, Massachusetts enforces emergency domestic violence protection orders for victims of abuse. If the courts are closed, you can file a 24 hour emergency protective order by going to the nearest police station.

Let Us Help You

The legal process of divorce can be complicated, especially for spouses juggling careers and children. Our Framingham divorce attorneys are deeply invested in providing compassionate, practical legal solutions for our clients. We understand families keep busy schedules, which is why we make ourselves available when you need us the most. Our attorneys have weekend and after-hour availability, so you don’t have to take too much time off of work to get your legal matters resolved. Call (888) 209-7080 to schedule your free case consultation today.

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